From what I know about pitching a movie to a studio, you should have a concise 2-3 sentence summary of what the movie is about. The dialogue and script can come later. Maybe. When you’re dealing with a world of mash-ups, reboots, and obscene product placement, things like dialogue and character development aren’t always at…
Singers do it… Actors do it… Talentless heiresses do it… Never before has a comedian had a signature line of cologne. so darn it, I will be the first. Trail blazer, that’s me…. Check out the commercial. Phil Johnson http://www.RoadsideAttraction.com http://www.facebook.com/philjohnsoncomedy
Scientists this week at the Geological Society of America Conference are debating whether we’ve entered a new epoch. For the last 10,000 years we’ve been hanging around the Holocene epoch and pretty much jacking the place up. They’d like to call this new epoch the Anthropocene, or the Age of Man, because of the geophysical…
Bees can only use their stinger once since it will rip their guts out through their butt and kill them. That makes me figure that a bee really needs to be pissed off to sting you. I don’t think he would be like, “That guy’s a Raiders fan….He’s going down.” But most people who get…
Every geek dreams of it. And not just hanging out with a dude dressed like a Star Wars character at ComicCon. But you know hanging out with some of these people/beings/things would be a hell of a lot of fun. Here’s my choices. 7. Han Solo – Duh… The dude has some great stories to…
I was doing a bit of research for a joke the other day (cuz I do that…) and discovered that there are parents stupid enough out there to give their kids the same name as a famous criminal. Case in point… Father Al Capone of St. Michael’s Parish School in Lowell, MA. Granted his first…
Ok, Yahoo posted this thing the other about jobs that pay over a hundred grand and don’t require a degree. Such as… Nuclear Power Reactor Operator… Oh man. The Simpson’s should have a much larger house then, shouldn’t they? A hundred grand would go a long way in Springfield. Or buy a lot of doughnuts. …
This is a great bit from Greg Behrendt’s last DVD about playing “Free Pass” with your spouse. Not a good idea. This clip is just the beginning of the bit and I definitely recommend getting the DVD to see the rest. Also, go over to YouTube and look for his bits about Pictionary and Chicken…
I’ve had this picture sitting on my computer for awhile and keep forgetting to post it. Ya gotta love it… By they way, that’s the club owner’s mom. 🙂 If you’re ever in Dublin, CA, stop by Bunjo’s Comedy Lounge and say hi to Isabel. Speaking of which, I’ll be headlining there this Saturday the…
I recently got back from my first trip to Hawaii. My girlfriend and love to eat on any trip, though we’re not really foodies. We’re too cheap to be real foodies. But we do enjoy checking out the local cuisine. She asked her more Hawaii-experienced friends what we should eat while there. They said, “Ooh,…
It’s story time kids!… Sometimes I feel just like a gerbil, running around and around on his wheel. It just never stops, does it? here I am sitting down to have a steamy bowl of jambalaya and the damn phone rings again. “Hello?” I say. “Alright yeah, I’ll be there in 15 minutes. No, she’s…
I was surfing last night (yes, on a perfectly legitimate site), and there was this ad for “7 Innocent Words That Turn Women On”. “Well,” I thought to myself, “In the interests of science and psychology, I should check this out.” They claim you can use a few normal little words in a perfectly innocent…
I sometimes think about her. The robotic voice on the other end of 767-2676. She was the first person everyone would call after a power outage, because she knew what time it was. And not in a “Morris Day” kind of way. As a kid, the popcorn lady was always a safe phone call you…
I don’t envy the people that have to go through the job interview process. They always seem to demand more acting skill than any audition I’ve ever been on. I never really went through a real interview process like most people do. For one job, working at a Montgomery Ward, painting the place, my interview…
Yahoo Games recently did an article about the origins of Simon Says. My god, how it must be nice to have a paid journalism (?) job where you don’t have to deal with all the pesky news and current events stuff. Anyway, the article is at http://blog.games.yahoo.com/blog/775-simon-who-the-story-behind-a-playground-favorite Apparently, Simon used to be Cicero, the famous…
I’ve worked with Eric Schwartz many times. This would be the Eric Schwartz with hair that sings instead of raps. The other one is good too. 🙂 Anyway, this Eric Schwartz has a fantastic song about a thing that many singers are thinking at some point during the show. And the brilliant thing is that…
We have a neighbor we call Creepy Indian Guy. Not because he’s Indian. It’s because he’s creepy. He’s a starer. He spends a good part of the day hanging out in front of his house just staring at whatever apparently needs staring at. Like a super hero with laser eye powers that are on the…
I’m in the midst of reading Cannabiz, a book about the new legitimate marijuana industry and the battle for legalization. Now make no mistake, I’m in favor of full legalization of weed, mostly because I believe in Darwinism. People dumbing themselves down makes for less competition for the rest of us. And since they’re going…
So, I’m driving down a two-lane highway, going the speed limit-ish because I’ve got two out of state tickets on my record and my insurance is through the roof. I’m in the left lane because I’m going faster than all the semi’s in the right lane. Rolling up behind me is a dude in a…
There’s been a movement in the diet industry lately about “eat like our ancestors did.” The Paleo Diet is one, but I’ve seen it mentioned in other diet plans too. Umm… Those old cave men lived to about the age of 25. I’d have been dead before I got out of college. Which is kind…
I was reading the other day about the Athabasca oil sands in Alberta, Canada. Yup, Canada has oil. Oil that, shock and surprise, we’d like to have. And while they’re mining the oil and there’s a whole industry around it, I don’t think it’s really shown up on the radar of the average American yet….
Well, it’s Easter time again. According to this Yahoo article today the Last Supper actually took place a day earlier than previously thought. Wednesday instead of Thursday. All this confusion could have been avoided if Jesus had just left his Day Planner behind in the grave he rose from. The difference in opinion seems to…
We all dream for years of owning our own little homestead. And when you get it, it’s exhilarating. Then begins the eternal quest to keep the damn thing from falling apart. Remember when you made a fort out of couch cushions when you were a kid? Those were more stable than many houses. Those old…
