I was talking with a young child about life the other day.  I do things like that.  Legit though.  Not in a creepy Michael Jackson way.  And the kid asked me “What is dying like?”

I told him, “It’s terrible.  The worst feeling you can imagine.  There’s a big white light shining in your face and total silence.”

He asked, “Are there other people there?  Your friends and family?”

I said, “More likely a room full of tired drunks.  Unless it’s an open mic, then just other comics.”