The Solution To The American Educational System’s Problems

Spider Girl

You can't tell me young boys wouldn't pay attention in class if the study materials looked like this.

Last night I was thinking about why I enjoy reading so much more now than I did when I was in school. I generally read non-fiction, learn-y type books too. I’ve decided that text books were just boring. I know, deep thinker, right?

But books are still big sellers and lots of people read. So maybe text book writers should model their offerings after the types of books that sell the best.  Comic books and romance novels.

For instance……

Spider Man: I’ll get you Doc Octopus like a blue whale gets 40 million krill per day!

Dr. Octopus: No you won’t Spider Man!  Given your present angle to me and the calculation of wind shear as V(z)=V(zref) x (In(z/z0)/In(zref/zo) your web will completely miss m…. Argh!

Spider Man: Physics is my bitch Octopus!

Or this…

As her heaving bosom settled atop his clean shaven head, Babbette whispered, “Oh Cletus, tell me again about Shay’s Rebellion of 1786.  Hearing about fiscally harsh government policies and a lack of hard currency does so engorge my loins.”

To which Cletus, ears deep in the folds of her womanly flesh said, “Brbrbrrrbbbbbbrbbbrrrbbb articles of confederation rrbrbbbrbrbbbrrrbbr.”

Seriously… We could probably send test scores through the roof with this stuff.  A couple of closeted gay, sparkly vampires and an entire generation of young girls could learn automotive repair.

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