Star Wars Complete Saga Blu-Ray – Drowning In Geekery

Luke Skywalker on Tattooine

I can see the Tattooine Best Buy from here!

When “Star Wars – The Complete Saga” comes out on Sept 12th, I’m going to have a hard time not plunking down my money for it.  You see, I had a VHS bootleg before any of the movies were out.  Then I bought the VHS’s.  Then I bought the DVDs.  Then I bought the remastered DVDs. Good lord, I still have boxes of action figures in my closet.

I watched the movies more times than I can count.  I even have the prequels, which so many fans love to hate on.

So I suppose I’ll end up buying the blu-ray as well.  The problem is I hate blu-ray.  Everything is too sharp and clean.  It makes it look fake and I think it ruins the effect of cgi.  Avatar looks like a low-budget video game in blu-ray.  It makes me want to wear my girlfriend’s eye glasses just to blur the edges a bit.  And Jar-Jar Binks looks fake enough without any help from blu-ray, thank you very much.

Ah… but the 40 hours of extras.  Enough deleted scenes, documentaries, bloopers, commentaries, and random crap to choke a rancor.  Despite the fact that I’ve read all the books and seen the extras on everything other DVD… And despite the fact that I should know better since I’ve been on movie sets, I’ll watch them.  Not all at once of course.  You need a pee break sometime.

Movie sets are way less exciting than they seem.  It’s a lot of waiting while other people get their shit together for the next scene.  No doubt, it’s still fun, creative work.  But action packed, it ain’t.

40 hours of extras for Star Wars nerds… That could cause multi-day global slowdown in technology advancements between Sept 12th and 15th as nerds everywhere lock the door and settle into the couch with a bag of Funyons and their shiny new blu-ray discs.  Just think of it, 40 hours of George Lucas’s monotone voice…

Plus, they’re fixing things.  You won’t see the stick in the Wampa’s arm anymore.  And Yoda has been replaced with CGI (poor Frank Oz) so he doesn’t look all cross-eyed in the prequels.  I always wondered when Yoda might have had eye surgery between episode 3 and 4.  And, if I’ve heard correctly, Han is shooting first again.  As it should be.  🙂

So yes, I’ll probably plunk down my $90 for the set when it comes out.  And a blu-ray player.  I don’t have one.

Phil Johnson

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