I’m in the post office and the lady in front of me has one of those tiny yapper dogs on a leash with her.  The dog is dressed in a road-cone-orange vest of some sort.

I said “Wow, that’s the smallest seeing eye dog I’ve ever seen.”

And she turned her blank stare towards me and said, “Oh, it’s not a seeing eye dog.”

I didn’t expect her to get it, but the people around me had a good little giggle.

It used to be that you didn’t bring dogs into a public building unless they were a service dog.  You had to be blind, or deaf, or mentally handicapped in some way.

Though I guess anyone who will let a teacup chihuahua crap in a $300 Coach purse could be considered mentally handicapped.

If these vapid fashionistas can drag their pooches around stores, I can too.

I want to get a red wagon and a St. Bernard and stroll right into Forever 21.
Just walk right in with a giant, flatulent St. Bernard.

“Oh, Bon Bon!  Did you make a poufy?”

Somebody get a video camera….

Phil Johnson
www.RoadsideAttraction.com