Indians Are The Smartest Immigrants

Indians said "Yeah, right that looks like an improvement..."

I’ve been thinking about immigrants and the way they assimilate into American society.  It used to be that groups would come here, live in abhorrent conditions and work their way up.

I’m thinking of the Italians and Irish living in Four Points, African Americans in Brooklyn, Asians in a variety of Chinatowns and gold mining camps.

I don’t know of any town that has a Little India.  You know why?  Because they said, “Screw that!  If I want to live in a slum, I’ll stay in India!  I’ll earn American money over the phone, and THEN move there!”

That’s solid planning there, my friends.

The longer a group is here though, the more they lost their ethnic identity.  Take Italians, for instance.  The first generation here speaks fluent Italian and just a little English.

The second generation speaks good English and only remembers how to swear in Italian.

The third generation only has childhood memories of being sworn at in Italian.  But they still call it “pasta” and try to pull off the stereotype of the great Italian lover.

The fourth generation says “The Mother Land” and means New Jersey.  And they actually believe that good Italian food can be found at Olive Garden.

I’m in that 3rd generation… Another good reason to not have kids.

That fourth generation dons a power suit of blue with a red tie and the assimilation is complete.  You thought Borgs were scary… Check out an army of power suits.

Phil Johnson

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